A quiz

March 26, 2009 § 2 Comments

Here’s a little questionnaire to keep everyone pondering for a short period of time.

1. What do you call a guy who completely ignores his female guest for one week after she refuses to sleep with him, but ‘accidentally’ lets her walk in on him completely nude with his lady friend?

2. What do you say when people ask you ‘where are you from’ and when you reply ‘everywhere’ they start getting agro and curse at you in a foreign language?

3. How do you discreetly excuse yourself when invited for drinks by a guy who at first seemed decent enough but after 20 minutes gets drunk on ouzo and begins to knock things over?

4. How does one avoid 1, 2, and 3?<

My answers:

1. Weirdo, creepo, jerk-off, douchebag, et cetera.

2. Nothing. A finger speaks louder than words.

3. I have to go home to sleep.

4. JUST GET THE HELL OUT, MAN.

Needless to say, although I've enjoyed Athens tremendously, Answers 1 and 4 finds me at the airport 8 hours early for my flight. Blogging live from Athens Airport, eating french fries and chewing gum. Thanks for participating.

The airport

March 25, 2009 § 2 Comments

Guess where I’m spending the night tomorrow? Milan Airport. But why, you ask? I was only there last week to leave to Athens. On a one way ticket.

Because. Flight Centre had given me information that I could fly to my next destination from Athens. But no. This is not true. There is no truth in this information. No, no, no. However it appears they fly from Milan. Great! I just have to GO BACK THERE! How do I do that? I have to BUY ANOTHER TICKET! Yay!

I have just spent a considerable amount of money to fly back to an airport I have already been to, just to burn 12 hours while waiting for my next flight the following morning. At night. In Milan Airport. All alone. How shall I entertain myself?

Should I blame Flight Centre for this? Yes or no? Food for thought while I venture out one final time to the Ancient Agora. I hope I don’t meet any clowns today, or it shall be quite unpleasant for everyone involved.

Just a thought

March 23, 2009 § 7 Comments

After a day of strolling around the Acropolis, the Temple of Zeus and various other antiquities, I would like to get a T-shirt with the following words:

If you are a clown, please stay the fuck away from me.

If you try to hook your arms onto mine, I shall have to remove them.

If you say ‘ni hau ma’ or ‘konichiwa’ to me, I shall have to kill you. Painfully.

If you are one person guilty of all of the above, I admit, you caught me in a state of shock so my reactions were slightly slow. But please pray we will never meet again or second and third point shall come true. See first point for your own safety.

It would be an awesome T-shirt.

Umm

March 20, 2009 § 4 Comments

I’m couchsurfing with GI Joe at the moment here in Athens. Only he is Greek. And his name is not Joe. G works in the airforce. He is beefy. And likes to paint. His flat is full of paint. The taps are painted yellow. Even the bathtub and the sink are shades of blue. Complements the red and orange walls well.

This morning I woke up to this sea of colours and stumbled my way into the yellow kitchen and opened the yellow fridge. It took me 45 minutes to boil some eggs. This was after I realized I had turned on the wrong hot plate and burned a large hole in the packet of muesli sitting on it. G has tons of stuff sitting on each hot plate. This I do not understand. Just like the painted white goods.

I’m still sleepy as hell, but at least after one hour, I got to eat some breakfast. I’m sorry about the lack of photos, but I need to find a computer which will let me transfer images from my phone. Oh dear, it is almost time for lunch.

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