Hello, 2012

January 15, 2012 § Leave a comment

The new year has come and gone, and I don’t like making resolutions, only because I don’t want to give myself any additional chores to fulfil. I think I’ve got enough to deal with, and lately, with a baby on the way, I’ve found myself knee-deep in the most uninteresting of things – breastfeeding accessories. Recently I have developed an aversion to sharing too much of my private life online, but today, I’m lamenting my previous life as an world explorer turned unexpected single parent. Perhaps I should change the name of my blog. Anyway, I have discovered that breastfeeding a baby is not as simple as one might imagine. One would think that it would just be a matter of shoving the little thing onto your nipple and it would just happen automatically. It turns out that apparently it is not so. It is not so at all, which is why devices such as breast-pumps have been invented, along with a whole range of accompaniments for what promises to be an uncomfortable experience such as nipple shields, creams, and a list of stuff I really hope I won’t need. Nevertheless, I do like to be prepared, so with roughly 3 more months to go, I’m slowly, very slowly, preparing myself for the onslaught that is sure to come. All this turmoil, for so tiny a thing. I’m actually worried the cat might develop some kind of complex as well.

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End-of-year wrap up

December 26, 2011 § 2 Comments

It’s been a while since I last posted something, only because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to document the last few months online. However, 2011 has been pretty significant in ways I never imagined, so I thought I would just summarize the year by doing my favourite thing: make a list.

1. I struggled through a few months of depression and sought counselling. I later realized it was the product of a bad relationship which brought out the worst in me. The relationship died a natural death and it wasn’t until the middle of the year that I felt more like myself again.
2. I adopted a kitten, Frodo. Although sometimes he really tests my patience, he has brought me more comfort and amusement than counselling ever did. In the 6 months I’ve had him, he’s learnt to play fetch, growl, and come to me when I call for him.
3. I travelled to South America, and saw amazing places.
4. I met someone who made me happier in a week than I had been in over 2 years. Unfortunately he had to leave the country after that week.
5. Last but not least, I’m preparing myself to be a single parent. Yes, that is correct.

2012 will be challenging.

We are family

April 13, 2009 § 6 Comments

It has suddenly occurred to me why I visit family so very infrequently. Because we live on two different continents, we see each other perhaps once every one or two years, for a period of 2 weeks at most. Each time we get together, it has dawned on me that each visit brings with it an endless parade of petty complaints, personal wealth comparisons, and just plain gossip about everyone and everything under the sun.

With my parents having approximately 20 siblings between the two of them, gossip is plentiful amongst uncles, aunts and cousins. Naturally, one of the most talked about topics is money. Who has lots of it, who has none, and what each person is doing with theirs. My money is clearly my own business and though some may argue that when it comes to close family members it is alright to discuss it freely, I truly despise talking about it. That is because I know once this personal information is leaked out, even to immediate family, the entire clan will soon know, and thus, the judging begins. Money is not taboo and no one will ever hesitate to tell you what they think you should do with yours.

Another topic is who is getting married, who is dating who, and what they think of each person’s significant other. The two most highly regarded traits are his/her profession, and the colour of their skin. This, I have many gripes about, especially while recently engaging in this discussion with regards to my own personal life. Although no ill intent was meant, the general consensus is that being with someone of a different race was not the ‘perfect’ situation, and perhaps I hadn’t looked hard enough. In this day and age where increasingly we are becoming more of a global race rather than individual races, I couldn’t help but be slightly disappointed at this unfortunate stigma.

So, I feel like I’m 15 again. Still unable to discuss what I consider modern issues with my family. We bicker and fight like old times, say awful things to one another, and tomorrow it is like nothing ever happened. In the history of the last 9 years, this is the longest time I’ve ever spent with them, and now I know why it happens so rarely. Will I last till June, or will we kill each other by then?

Home, not really

April 2, 2009 § 2 Comments

Just to provide a brief update to those who don’t know, I’m back in the land of my birth, Malaysia, where I spent the first 13 years of my life, visiting the parents. It feels strange to be here, in my parents’ house, in my room, which isn’t even really my room. It’s a room with some stuff that used to belong to a person who used to be me. Things feel familiar yet alien. Anyhow I’m going to be here for a couple of months, a 30-year old bum living with her parents. I know, I’ve achieved so much!

For once, I can understand what people are saying all around me. However I only realized the effects of my European sojourn when I experienced a rather funny incident of reverse culture shock at the airport. With all seriousness I said to the Malay baggage controller ‘Oui! No, I meant Si!’ when I really wanted to say ‘Ya’ which means ‘Yes’ in Malay. At this the guy gave me a look of ‘wtf?’ and quickly, I slid away.

Other than the tragedy of me trying to reacquaint myself with languages, I have also been on the mission to rejuvenate myself as a normal girl again. Hello hair conditioner and skin moisturizer. But when I got to the pharmacy, I kind of remembered, this is Asia. There were 20 different types of whitening cream but all I really wanted was simple skin moisturizer. It took almost half and hour to finally find something comparable, but even that had a touch of ‘whitening’ to it. Personally I like having olive skin and a tanned complexion, and I don’t really want to be whitened, but in a place where people carry umbrellas daintily in the sun, it’s hard to escape.

So, hopefully in a few weeks time I will have soft skin and nice hair, and remember what it feels like to wear a dress. Oh yes, I’m in Asia. I’ve deprived myself for too long. The shopping begins.

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