Confusion galore

October 17, 2009 § 2 Comments

Sitting at home on a Saturday night with nought for company except my own delirious mind, I can’t help but wonder about the state of my current situation. Early last month I bit the bullet and went to work a temporary job. I took it knowing I would be doing tasks beneath my qualifications and accept a big pay cut. Gnawing my knuckles throughout the entire 6 weeks, I became anti-social and I’m pretty sure I’ve made some office enemies during my short stay. But that was quite alright because I stayed knowing I would leave, and just could not see myself going back for even one zombie-fying day. So I told the upper management exactly that.

However, upper management turned around and decided to offer me a full-time job, at 10% more than what I was paid before I left Sydney. WTF? I hesitated. Although some would argue that given the GFC, I really can’t ask for more, why then do I have the same sinking feeling I had when I left Sydney exactly 12 months ago? Coming back was supposed to be about being able to turn over a new leaf, not going back to the old one.

Weighing my pros and cons, I have decided that it would be unwise to refuse the offer. I do hope it’s only temporary. REALLY temporary. There is more of me, yet to come, and it cannot be revealed being an office zombie, working on projects I care nothing about and with people I care less about. This, I realize, is not a good attitude at all. But if happiness could be measured, working in this office would not be part of its defining parameters. In fact, it would contribute to measuring sadness. I have copious amounts of that at the moment. See? Money really doesn’t buy happiness.

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§ 2 Responses to Confusion galore

  • Orhan Kahn says:

    Money can by you comfort leading to happiness and you are obviously very uncomfortable at the moment. I’m sorry to hear that. Truly. I know exactly what you’re feeling.

  • Steph says:

    Thanks. I know it will get worse before it gets better, but the important thing is, I’ll get there eventually.

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